Interpersonal Attraction essay

Interpersonal attraction is typically defined as an attraction between human beings that can lead to the formation of either friendships, romantic relationships or both. Colloquially, interpersonal attraction refers to the extent of like, love, dislike or hatred one person feels towards another person (Baron & Byrne, 2004). The association might be based on limerence, liking or loving some interactions in some regular business associations or just from the various type of social commitment. This interpersonal attraction may lead to relationships between individuals which can be romantic or may be just a parent-child relationship. Most psychologist have suggested several factors that may lead to interpersonal relationship that can be anything that can draw two people together following some affections, liking, respecting or loving. Psychologist have found the topic an interesting area of research since human beings are known to be social animals and therefore attraction better serves as an important aspect in the formation of social networks. They have employed the use questionnaires in trying to evaluate the levels of attraction of a person towards a person. They have arrived in finding out that social reward, similarity; familiarities as well as physical attractiveness have all contributed in the determination of those one is attracted to.  (Swami, 2007)

Interpersonal attraction was originally considered to be an  attitude that elevates positive sentiments for another person serving as the instrument for instigating interpersonal interaction. However, in recent years the general consensus is that attraction is an affective and vibrant force that draws people together permeating different stages of interpersonal relationships. There are various partner’s personality which acts as determinant of attractions. Those people who are perceived to be very warm, humorous, amiable, positive, smart, gregarious, interesting and mostly confident are in a more clear way referred to as being more ingratiating than those who would posses such attributes such as insecure, boring, negative, irresponsible, insensitive or unstable. Those people who are extroverts are usually considered to be more attractive than introverts. (Confetti, 2001) Another guiding thing in personal attractions is the mutual things that attract us. We are more likely to attract those people who we seem to share mutual interest as we would fancy such people. In order for people to meet, they must be coming from the same vicinity and be of similar age, sharing similar cultural backgrounds and most likely having the same education background. In order to enjoy peace, harmony and minimal conflicts, we tend to attract those whose attitudes, beliefs, values, likes and interest are in a more consistent to us. This way, we try to reserve some good times with those who we enjoy their company and also those with whom we feel very free and comfortable. When we progress a step further from just attraction to developing a relationship, the partner we choose is more likely to have a comparable degree of physical attractiveness to those of our own. Research has shown that, people do not necessarily attract the remarkably the most competent persons but rather, those whom we share similar competence levels to our own matters if education, interest, interpersonal skills as well as sporting prowess. Those individuals who may appear to be exceptionally competent are in most cases considered to be less impressive as one fears feeling inferior in such a relationship. In some more general forms, when we may find a person to be initially appealing , we might project them to our ideal future partners. This may be arising from some residue from some unmet childhood dreams. Instead of seeing the potential partner as the human being he or she is, we fool ourselves with the believing that, the prospective person is should respond to our revealed motives. At this point, people may be termed as having fallen in love, where the love part of it is due to the illusions carried forward rather than looking for the true person in those partners. In this kind of attraction the person preoccupied by the self serving motives are led into idolising them to the point where, if the response is negative, frustrations and regrets are the immediate results when things don’t work. Instead, real love brought by true attraction should germinate from accepting and loving the actual person for what they are and not for what we want them to be.  (Bob Donahue,Marilyn Donahue, 1982)

Interpersonal Attraction essay

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